'I had a stroke days after giving birth, years later I buried my son'

New mum Funmi Lawal should have been basking in a newborn baby bubble in the days after giving birth, but instead she was plunged into a fight for her life.

Funmi Lawal, 58, from London, experienced high blood pressure during her pregnancy with her second child and was on the highest dose of medication to try and control it. Having high blood pressure is hereditary for Funmi, but things took a shocking turn when she had a stroke seven days after giving birth to her daughter.

"The day the stroke happened in December 2002, I didn't feel anything unusual," Funmi tells the Mirror, "The midwife visited and took my blood pressure. There was a lot of noise, but she said it was fine. But looking back now, I couldn't have been fine."

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The mum, who was 35 years old at the time, continues, "I started having headaches that afternoon, but I didn't think anything of it. We had my daughter's naming ceremony the next day, so I thought I'd go to the doctors to find out what was wrong afterwards. But that night I had a stroke.

"I remember waking up my husband, and I said, 'I've got a headache', so he got up to give me some water to drink, but the next thing I knew, I was walking, and I fell. My leg had gone and I weed on myself."

Her husband called her parents from the other room to help, and Funmi's dad rushed to her side and held her. In that moment, he heartbreakingly screamed, 'It won't happen again, it won't happen again', as they had previously lost Funmi's brother.

She continues, "I couldn't talk. I didn't know what was happening or what it was. I was in and out of consciousness, but by the time the ambulance came, I was fully unconscious."

Funmi was taken to hospital and had a CT scan, but during this, her heart stopped. "When my sister saw all the doctors running into the CT scan, she thought the worst. But they brought me back," Funmi explains.

Funmi had brain surgery 24 hours after the stroke, but her family were told by doctors that she might not survive or never walk or talk again. After the surgery, she was in and out of a coma for a few days.

"When I woke up, I could hear everything everybody was saying, and I could recognise all my family and friends.

"My best friend kept saying, 'Your baby is fine, your baby is fine'. I could hear all the things they were saying, but I couldn't reply - it was so frustrating."

The now mum-of-two spent six weeks in hospital and recalls the moment she first saw herself in the mirror. "I couldn't believe what I was seeing, half of my head was shaved off, and seeing myself was a shock, so I just burst into tears."

When Funmi was discharged from hospital, she still couldn't talk or freely move her arms. She went to rehab, speech therapy and physiotherapy and regained movements in her arms, but it wasn't until mid-2003 that she fully got her speech back.

"It was so frustrating with the speech, as you say things in your mind and you think people will understand," she recalls. "I was really quiet too because I could not believe I could have a stroke."

When it came to her mobility, she was able to move but couldn't walk long distances. Further recovery followed, which was complicated by kidney failure and years on dialysis before a transplant, but this sparked an idea.

Funmi launched her product ClipKnix - adaptive underwear that can be put on lying, sitting, or standing. It allows women with mobility issues to have independence and dignity.

Today, Funmi requires a walking aide to help with her mobility, but says this is due to her arthritis.

Despite all the odds, Funmi remained positive as she tells us, "I always believed I would not be disabled, I always believed everything would be okay. I always believed that my baby will be okay. My mum was there, she was looking after her, so I didn't have to worry about that. I always had a positive outlook."

However, she candidly admits that having the stroke so soon after giving birth impacted her bond with her daughter. "Up to today, I've never bonded with my daughter, and she's never bonded with me either. It's a mutual respect. We're not like a normal mother and daughter, but it breaks my heart.

"It's the way she grew up. I never gave her my full attention, and she thought my mum was her mum as she helped so much."

Then, in July 2021, tragedy struck again when Funmi tragically lost her son and eldest child, Mubarrak, who was just 22 years old. The heartbroken mum said he "was fine" on the day, "he went on his way", and then he was gone.

However, what happened to her son "remains a mystery". Funmi says, "I wasn't there when it happened, so I can't say much about the circumstances that led to it. The bottom line, he's dead."

On the podcast, Lemonade Leaders, Funmi also shared, "It was the worst pain I have ever felt. No parent should have to bury their child."

She adds, "It was very difficult and I cried and cried."

You can listen to more of Funmi’s story now onLemonade Leaders.